A God Who Holds Gardening Shears
I am sitting on my comfortable (and greatly missed) memory foam bed, in my bright white room, with my faithful fluff nodding off to sleep at my feet. I am staring out the window at the deadened plants, longing for the spring season that is being promised in the 66 degree weather. It's spring break this week, and while I should be devotedly studying the pharmacology book laying open at my side, I sit here contemplating life. The theme in my mind is very much like that outside of my window. The past several months have been a season of death, but God continues to remind me that, just as plants come back to life in the spring, through the light of His presence, a new season of growth is beginning.
One definition of the word death is this,"a damaging or destructive state of affairs." This makes me think of a gardener. An inexperienced gardener will make mistakes that damage her plants. This may be caused by not following proper directions (such as forgetting to water or feed her plants or allows the weeds to become overgrown), or overconfidence in her abilities, but the result of death is from her own naive mind. However, even the most experienced gardener cannot control the weather, animals, or certain circumstances which cause the destruction to her beloved plants. How often is this concept true in my life? Just as the inexperienced gardener causes her own failure by simple mistakes, I often fail in my life because I am overconfident in myself and fail to seek instruction. At other times, even when I am humble and seeking instruction as with the experienced gardener, I fall because of natural circumstances where I allow myself to gravitate toward my sin nature.
I am often fooled by the idea that only the inexperienced gardener is in need of direction. I could not have been more wrong. Both the inexperienced and experienced desperately need help. When I am in the depth of my failure, I recognize the need for my Savior. Yet, when life seems to be going great, when I am being fed with the Word and continue to grow in all directions, I make a tiny mistake and suddenly I am wilting. I have made a lot of mistakes over the past few months. I have struggled with things from my past, things about myself, and the frustration of various self-inflicted situations. Just as the inexperienced gardener often allows the overgrowth of weeds to destroy her plants, I allowed the "weeds" in my life to mingle with the growth in my life. This resulted in confusion and hurt, and I often felt like I was being strangled. I have wondered where God was in the midst of my struggle. I have doubted that He is able to pull me out of the mess I have tangled myself in. I struggled to feel God's presence, even when I was crying out to Him to save me. But the funny part is (I like to thing that God has a sense of humor), God was standing right behind me with a nice big pair of gardening shears, waiting for me to recognize Him so that he could bend down and cut away all of the weeds that were strangling me.
Although I believe I am forever going to be an inexperienced gardener, I know that there is always more to learn about tending the growth (and death) in my life. The best part? My teacher knows death like no other, and because of that offers healing like no other. As I follow Him, He is continually tending to me and teaching me to grow through trust in Him.
"I am the true vine, and My father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit. You are already clean because of the Word which I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches, He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples." -John 15:1-8
One definition of the word death is this,"a damaging or destructive state of affairs." This makes me think of a gardener. An inexperienced gardener will make mistakes that damage her plants. This may be caused by not following proper directions (such as forgetting to water or feed her plants or allows the weeds to become overgrown), or overconfidence in her abilities, but the result of death is from her own naive mind. However, even the most experienced gardener cannot control the weather, animals, or certain circumstances which cause the destruction to her beloved plants. How often is this concept true in my life? Just as the inexperienced gardener causes her own failure by simple mistakes, I often fail in my life because I am overconfident in myself and fail to seek instruction. At other times, even when I am humble and seeking instruction as with the experienced gardener, I fall because of natural circumstances where I allow myself to gravitate toward my sin nature.
I am often fooled by the idea that only the inexperienced gardener is in need of direction. I could not have been more wrong. Both the inexperienced and experienced desperately need help. When I am in the depth of my failure, I recognize the need for my Savior. Yet, when life seems to be going great, when I am being fed with the Word and continue to grow in all directions, I make a tiny mistake and suddenly I am wilting. I have made a lot of mistakes over the past few months. I have struggled with things from my past, things about myself, and the frustration of various self-inflicted situations. Just as the inexperienced gardener often allows the overgrowth of weeds to destroy her plants, I allowed the "weeds" in my life to mingle with the growth in my life. This resulted in confusion and hurt, and I often felt like I was being strangled. I have wondered where God was in the midst of my struggle. I have doubted that He is able to pull me out of the mess I have tangled myself in. I struggled to feel God's presence, even when I was crying out to Him to save me. But the funny part is (I like to thing that God has a sense of humor), God was standing right behind me with a nice big pair of gardening shears, waiting for me to recognize Him so that he could bend down and cut away all of the weeds that were strangling me.
Although I believe I am forever going to be an inexperienced gardener, I know that there is always more to learn about tending the growth (and death) in my life. The best part? My teacher knows death like no other, and because of that offers healing like no other. As I follow Him, He is continually tending to me and teaching me to grow through trust in Him.
"I am the true vine, and My father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit. You are already clean because of the Word which I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches, He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples." -John 15:1-8
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